Yesterday, half way through a day of working from home, everything ground to a halt. I was getting stressed about the upcoming LRP event this weekend, terrified of the prospect of denting my spoon reserves that seriously when I’m already so tired, but I don’t think it was about that, really. Things have been steadily getting worse for months, despite my overall situation being much better in practical terms.
Thank goodness for walk-in centres, or I’d never have remembered that my usual surgery provides urgent appointments. I went along and the nurse gave me a couple of questionnaires to fill in. I think I got a personal high score. They sent me to my GP for an urgent appointment immediately, and within half an hour (not counting travel) I had a prescription for antidepressants.
I’ve been trying to avoid the antidepressants, and I was rather hoping that my recent referral for gender dysphoria might help me manage my depression well enough, but it seems that it was just a matter of time before the depression got on top of me this time. I’ve been prescribed Lustral (sertraline), at 50mg increasing to 100mg next week. I’ve already discovered that I get nausea within a few hours of taking it. I don’t want to deal with queasy in the woods, so I’ve cancelled my trip.
That’s a brief explanation of where I’ve been and why I haven’t been very active for the last few weeks, and that’s all I have the spoons for, for now.